The illusion of choice is one of the greatest fabrications projected from and onto the human mind. It is the idea that keeps you searching and struggling when the truth is infinitely and eternally simple and ever present.
If I were an egomaniac – and, make no mistake, ‘I’ am, I would want to be in control of all things in the range of my awareness and choose among the illusion of infinite possibilities that are presented by my perception so that I could maintain a charade of power over ‘my’ domain at all times.
But what would be the purpose of such limiting behaviour?
A sense of security for the illusion of the I; a crazy idea that ‘I’ will live forever; some insane belief that ‘my’ domain is indestructible and the maddest of all, that ‘I’ can take ‘your’ energy, make it my own, conquer ‘you’ and increase ‘my’ power and, of course, rule the world.
Now that’s what I call ridiculously deluded, but it’s a game that we love to play. In fact, we’ve played it for so long with such gusto that we really, really, believe in its authenticity and have all kinds of ideas invested in this chimera. Actually, we are obsessed with these games and take them very seriously indeed. All of these games are about power rather than love. One of the things associated with taking power from others is the recurring dream about MONEY. This particular illusion causes more neurosis than almost anything else and is actually the cause of disruption, destruction, death and any other negative position you can think of that begins with ‘d’ (if your short on pointless activities to pass illusory time).
Everything around it is extremely sombre. For instance, ‘I’ (at least I think it was me), was walking home one day when I saw a security man transferring money from a bank in an armoured case, to an armoured car with an armoured expression on his stony face. He had various weapons about him, including a truncheon and a gun – notice money and guns are often seen together- just in case someone came to relieve him of the paper squares with pictures on them, which were locked in this reinforced container. People who attempt this are often placed in other reinforced containers or violently assaulted with weapons, and then their faces are broadcast on the television or in the newspapers.
I just wanted to burst out laughing, it was so comical to witness the bizarre appearance of this clumpy man and his artillery in a high street filled with people trying to improve their lives by purchasing items of limited use. They were also carrying paper squares with pictures on them, but theirs were ‘legally owned’ ‘ because they were ‘earned’ by performing activities known as ‘work’ and they were therefore permitted to possess these paper squares until they were exchanged for objects. After this, the paper shapes would again be returned to the bank where they would later be carried out in another re-enforced box, ad infinitum.
Sounds utterly preposterous when you put it that way but the world wants you to be so stressed about money that you can’t see straight. There’s a stupid game we all take part in called; ‘listen to me whine about my bills’. In this game, the players make depressed, anxious faces and bleat at great lengths about their lot and how hard it is for them to survive in the world. In the midst of this, their features usually contort and display a great deal of tension. Many of the people who take part in this game do have some money and are usually able to meet their basic needs, but there is a struggle related with their version of life that they believe comes down to the paper squares with someone’s face on them.
The point is, that it is the association that causes the depression, not the object that it is projected on. I recently decided, that after years of not having very much money – i.e. the kind of amount that can purchase luxury items of greater financial value than those purchased at, say, shops where items are normally made of low grade polyester, that I would conduct an experiment or, if you like, play a game called, ‘I am rich’. In this game, I would conduct behaviours that emanated the performances of the extremely prosperous and thereby magnetise my surrounding field to draw financial abundance in my general direction. This would accomplish 2 things: 1. it would break the spell that I have projected upon myself concerning belief in poverty and 2. It would provide me with enough paper squares to accomplish feats that required greater amounts of them… I’ll keep you informed on results!
Contrary to what the world wants you to believe, money does not save lives nor make anything better but might merely provide an energetic means to anaesthetise you to the conditions of the dream and make them seemingly more pleasant to tolerate.
Bear with me; I am getting to a point
Another game that is frequently played is ‘I am the authority and you are under my jurisdiction.’ In this game, burly people with very stern faces exhibit hostile behaviour with the intent to make you feel intimidated so that you may cower in their presence and possibly confess to some crime you had absolutely no association with (yet another game called crime and punishment).
For example, you travel to a foreign country, say, the USA. You arrive at the passport control and are interrogated by men or women with very; very serious faces asking very, very serious questions in robotically monotonous voices that make you query whether their original forms have been replaced by pod men in the middle of the night. The inquiries are usually concerning ‘the nature of your visit to the U.S. because everyone who isn’t ‘me’ is a potential terrorist. ‘You may be carrying sharp items in your luggage such as eyebrow tweezers or toothpicks with which you may perform crimes that constitute a threat to the welfare of the state and therefore I must ask you to come with me’. Well, guess what; the dictionary defines terrorism as: ‘a person who terrorises or frightens others’ and trust me, after an encounter with the American inquisition, you will definitely feel terrorised.
Yes my friends, we have become so wrapped up in these BS stories that we are falling further and further into the bottomless pit called ‘my narcissistic neuroses’ (and friends). So how did we come to this?
Well, let’s see:
Once upon a time there were these life forms that became so used to believing in separation that they started to think that they were real people with real lives who owned houses, cars, children; had jobs, relationships; got ill, grew old and died– And these people started playing more complicated roles because they forgot what they really were and where they had come from. Eventually they became so wrapped up in their own BS, they actually started trying to destroy each others projections in an effort to uphold the pretence around their silly stories, eliminating anything that might threaten their illusion… and this, in a nutshell, is the definition of life in our world.
If you think that this could not possibly be us try this quick quiz:
Quiz title: Are you willing to let go of everything that defines you and fall helplessly into the bottomless pit called zero with absolutely no assurance of survival…
1. Someone disagrees with absolutely everything you stand for. Do you
a) Shoot him
b) Take him to a Japanese torture camp and systematically brainwash him until he doesn’t know who he is anymore and agrees with anything and everything you say
c) Watch crap soaps on TV until your eyes turn square and you can’t remember who you are , who he is and what he disagreed with in the first place
2. Someone bashes a hole in your car door with a large hammer. Would you
a) Bash a hole in their head with a larger hammer
b) Sell them as a slave to the black market slave trade and reimburse your car fees
c) Have a cold one and forget about it
3. You have everything you’ve ever worked for and owned swallowed up by a huge tsunami called the taxman. Would you:
a) Rob a Mafiosi member and reimburse yourself
b) Wail to God until you sound like Rod Stewart and then get a mullet to complete the image
c) Have cup of tea, eat Mr Kipling’s cakes and contemplate life without any possessions
4. A huge mammoth like creature comes out of a space ship in the middle of the night and demands your lifelong allegiance to a cause you’ve never heard of. Would you:
a) Finally use your years of geek study and speak to it in Mammothian Yekula pointing out the errors in the spaceship landing and how you could swap navigation lessons for your freedom
b) Explode the weapons of mass destruction you have had hiding in your cellar in the event of times such as these
c) Tell him you need to go to the bathroom and slip out the back way for a swift half at the local. Once there mull over the implications of sharing the planet with large mammothites and whether or not they would hog the remote on TV nights
(Note: this ridiculous quiz does not bear any relation to anything at all and is merely there for distraction and entertainment purposes in the bland hope that we might forget about our neurosis for an instant and slip into holy awakening)
I could go on but I think I’ve drivelled enough…
Furthermore, there are stories about lots of other things like lawsuits, domestic feuds, robberies, riots, politics: a quick word here -this is actually a very entertaining game where the actors conduct a play full of twisted half truths, unfulfilled promises, bluffs and gargantuan mistakes followed by limp apologies and never enough compensation. These displays are generally performed by players who believe that putting on a stripy blue suit alone should win them an Oscar but they are, in fact the most delusional of the entire array of contenders – next to the religious fanatics. Other stories include relationships, careers, the pharmaceutical industry, different kinds of animal flu and their own special vaccinations, spiritual seeking, new- ageism, drug and other addictions and so on and on, and on; all of these taking place all over the vast stage called ‘the world’.
As hugely tragic or entertaining as it may appear to be, once we have played our roles with vigour and expectation, we will always find that all that is waiting for us is a laughing skull where our face used to be, which although bears a grotesque countenance, is at least the only loyal chaperone when all the others have gone. No winner ever takes anything home because there are no winners, losers or reality in any duality. All there ever was and is, is existence playing roles through reflections of light; having a relationship with itself through the idea of you and the story of your life.
Which brings us back to the start; it’s a choiceless observation that cannot be grasped. It cannot be controlled or managed or altered in any way.
It doesn’t matter what you do to adjust the ever-changing to suit your needs, it’s like trying to catch flour with a sieve. Better to realise that I am that.
In the dead of the night, I surrendered all ideas to the great swirl of electric existence
Sensations arose and passed away
History was made and ended
And another story began.
With or without me
It made no difference…
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